A Letter To My Fellow Christians About “Same Love”…


Stop Confronting Homosexuals About Their Sin

Yes, I said it. It needed to be said. I’ve come across things on my Newsfeed about Macklemore’s Same Love performance on the Grammy’s – others embraced it, others rejected it.

I choose not to comment on that performance – it is what it is. But I soon saw outcries about the performance that bothered me. From a Christian perspective, I believe the topic of Homosexuality has not been handled well at all. For one, I truly don’t believe many understand how complex an issue of Homosexuality is especially to those who feel homosexual.

Usually the first approach I see Christians take when confronting Homosexuals is to tell them they are sinners. Wrong.

I’m not saying to deny that Homosexuality IS a sin, I’m saying don’t let that be the FIRST words out of your mouth.

Imagine yourself, you feel you were born a certain way. You in your physical mind cannot explain why, but you feel you can’t change it. Okay, now comes some well-meaning person who may not know how to empathize with that sort of situation and the first thing they say is “You’re a sinner who needs to repent”. I think many people who have been evangelized to can relate to this, not just homosexuals.  With that kind of  statement, your mind would shut down to their conversation and you’d think to yourself,  “I don’t want someone telling me I’m wrong for what I feel is right?”. I probably wouldn’t either. In fact, I didn’t want to be told that myself…

I can remember the darkest time of my life involved a time where I myself felt like I was homosexual. I couldn’t understand it nor could I explain it.  I grew in a Christian home, loved Jesus all my life, dated boys throughout high school…yet after a series of dramatic (and traumatic) relationships and falling away from God – I had come to a conclusion about my sexuality that I didn’t know how to express.

My family was disappointed to say the least and I was bombarded with questions all the time from my mother (who even said I was possessed by the devil). Thankfully, around this time I had started journaling my experiences. Through it all, I was amazed because I never lost sight of God (or more like He NEVER lost sight of me). I was completely honest about my feelings with God, I yelled and screamed at him constantly. I asked Him why and how this could happen to me. I yelled and yelled to no avail. Then it hit me. One dark and lonely night, one filled with suicidal thoughts – I cried out to God ” ..I give up. I give up trying to explain myself or understand myself…” I finally gave into God. I  remember praying “God, I don’t know how this happened or why this happened but I know that you have my best interests at hand and I give this over to you.”

Instantly, it was like a burden was lifted off my shoulders. I soon learned after what had happened – I stopped following ME and started following HIM. 

In life, we’ll be confronted with situations we JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND. It’s easy to rely on our own feelings and understanding to make sense of things. But sometimes, things just DON’T make sense. If you let yourself remain in that CONFUSION, it will take over your life and RUIN it.  But if you give that confusion to God, He will gracefully and gently lead you along the path He has set out for you since before you were even born.

Was I born Homosexual? No, I don’t believe so. Will some people say it was just a phase? Of course. But no matter what you call it, you couldn’t convince me during that time that I wasn’t gay. For some reason, the burden of who I thought I was clouded who God said I truly was.

Even so, looking back on it I learned that my experience had REALLY been a case of Following ME vs. Following GOD , a story of trying to figure out my OWN IDENTITY vs. ACCEPTING WHO GOD SAID I WAS.

Once I stopped trying to justify homosexuality and trying to understand it for my own purposes, I was able to see God more clearly and my confusion was silenced. His love showed me ..“If only you will stop thinking about what you feel and think, I can show you the way…I can give you peace.. I can lead you to an abundant life.”

I had to put my TRUST and FAITH in Him. I had to give up what I thought about my own life to the creator of life Himself. It wasn’t easy and at times, VERY SCARY but I’ve never looked back…



This isn’t over — Read Part 2 Here..





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  1. Pingback: Dee OnVine | A Letter To My Fellow Christians About “Same Love”…PART 2

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